When bored, browsing Craigslist is a great way to while away the hours. The Rants and Raves section is always fun (one poor fool moaned "why do women in LA hate white Republican working atheltic males?". Der. Move back to Texas, you musclebound corporate facist.) Missed Connections is good for a laugh ("I made out with you on Saturday night at Shelter and then I went to get a drink and you disappeared...").
But this posting by a gang of down-on-their-luck studs entitled Five Dudes Looking for Sugar Mamas has to win the Style Council's first "Craigslist Post of the Week Award". It tells the sorry tale of a bunch of "classy and successful guys" desperately seeking a Mrs Robinson to help pay the bills. These wannabe gigolos promise to treat their benefactresses "like the knight who wanted Rapunzel to 'let down her hair'", adding, "We will be your knight in shining armor (especially if that armor comes in the form of a nice BMW, bought by you, for us, to drive)."
"We will feed you grapes, dote over you, fan you with feathers, rub your feet, be the dashing hunk by your side as you walk down Rodeo Drive. We will style our hair (those of us that have it) in the latest fashions. We will tan our bodies, suck in our guts all day long, and generally do everything to make you happy. In return, you must fund our lifestyle when we're not with you, not ask too many direct questions about who we're with when we're not with you, and don't ask us where we were on friday and saturday night (if not with you)."
I contacted the guys and it seems they have only had one response so far, which reads thus:
"If you five f'ing lamos are "successful" than you don't need sugarmamas. You five queens need to just hangout with each other and leave the women in this town alone. What a pack of fucking losers. You can smell the cheese through the computer." Life is cruel.
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